Buyer Agents and Real Estate Jokes

Funny examples of unusual real estate listings & details:

How many buyer agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one national association of exclusive buyer agents because they want the whole world to see what’s going on.

from Real Estate Jokes Humor and Satire and Antion humor

The dream of the older generation was to pay off a mortgage. The dream of today’s young families is to get one.

If you think no one cares you’re alive, miss a couple of house payments.

This country is great. It’s the only place where you can borrow money for a down payment, get a 1st and 2nd mortgage and call yourself a homeowner.

My realtor sold me a two story house- one story before the sale, another after.

Sign next to FSBO: We shoot every third agent and the 2nd one just left.

A broker was dismayed when a brand new real estate office much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read ‘BEST AGENTS.’He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading ‘LOWEST COMMISSIONS.’The broker panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own real estate office. It read: ‘MAIN ENTRANCE

There is no longer a need for the neutron bomb. We already have something that destroys people and leaves buildings intact. It’s called a mortgage.

The trouble with owning a home is that no matter where you sit, you’re looking at something you should be doing.


A real estate agent was knocking on doors of homes in his farm area. At one house it was clear that someone was at home, but his repeated knocks at the door went unanswered. So, he took out one of his business cards and scribbled “Revelation 3:20″ on the back of it, stuck it in the door, and went about his rounds.

When he got back to the office the next day, the receptionist gave him a business card. It was his own, and he recognised the “Revelation 3:20″ he wrote the day before. In a very neat handwriting, a cryptic message was added: “Genesis 3:10″.

Later, when checking the Bible verse, he couldn’t help but break into gales of laughter.

Revelation 3:20 begin: “Behold, I stand at the door and knock.”

Genesis 3:10 reads: “I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked.”

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